Know Thyself

That title might sound pretentious, but honestly it's just a fancy way to say "Know your limits - you can't expect to go snowboarding for the first time in four years and hit a 30 foot kicker first try."
That, ladies and gentlemen, is what I learned this week.

That's not all, however. I learned that when life throws us unfortunate circumstances, we learn the most about ourselves: our maturity level, our sense of personal responsibility, the attitude we choose to have and the path we choose to carve for ourselves going forward. I heard a quote recently that summed up that sentiment:

“The happiness of this life depends less on what befalls you than the way in which you take it.”

As I've said before on here, we have the right, ability, and opportunity to choose how we will be in this life. We decide what our experience will be, if not exactly what we will experience. It's changed the way I look at adversity: instead of hardship, I see opportunity to learn about myself and gain perspective on how to improve.

Carpe Diem

7 Habits of Highly Effective People (Review)

There are not many books that I have read that have impressed me as much as "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" has. While many books profess to help guide their readers toward fulfillment and improvement, none do it so well as this classic. This work sets itself apart through a unique approach to the true nature and development of effectiveness, and a deep and resonating examination of the steps it espouses. The book organizes itself into two parts: the inner victory and the outer victory.

The inner victory sets forth the principles that the book is based on and discusses the first steps the reader will take on their path to effectiveness. It is here that this work differentiates itself from its fellows: while most of the self-improvement work of the past half-century have focused on personality tweaks and quick interpersonal tips to improve your effectiveness among others - "How to Win Friends and Influence People" is a well-known example - "7 Habits" begins its approach with a discussion of character and paradigms. The idea is that the root of ineffectiveness' problem is found in lacking strength of character and having a paradigm, or viewpoint, that is not in harmony with universal principles. The inner victory is to learn to apply these principles in our personal selves, before we even begin to interact with others. The book divides this into three steps: Think Proactive, Begin with the End in Mind, and Put First Things First. As Stephen R. Covey summarizes:

"Habit 1 says, "You're in charge. You're the creator." Being proactive is about choice. Habit 2 is the first, or mental, creation. Beginning with the End in Mind is about vision. Habit 3 is the second creation, the physical creation. This habit is where Habits 1 and 2 come together."

The outer victory builds on the foundation of the inner victory. The Habits are as follows: Think Win-Win, Seek to Understand & Then to Be Understood, Synergize, and Sharpening the Saw. They enable an individual to transcend independent effectiveness and become effective in interdependence. While the inner victory establishes the foundation for us to be effective individually, the outer victory concerns working with others and gaining a new level of effectiveness as we learn to work seamlessly with others. It finishes with the last Habit: self-renewal, or Sharpening the Saw. As we take time to renew ourselves and focus on our performance, we enable ourselves to see where we need to improve and how we can further enrich our lives.

As I've read this book and applied the principles contained inside, it has done wonders for my life. I find myself being able to appreciate life on a deeper level and enjoy a richness in relationships - including the one with myself - that I did not have before. This book comes highly recommended.

On Gratitude

This week I intend to fall to the cliche and participate in the madcap rush to talk about the recent holiday -Thanksgiving. I might be drowned in the flood of all the other band-wagoners, but I'll risk it. It's an important topic, and if nothing else, I will benefit from putting my own two cents into coherent thoughts.
Of all the reasons I enjoy Thanksgiving, I'll admit that food and football aren't the finalists. The top spot belongs unquestionably to family. I've spoken before about surrounding yourself with greatness, and that's exactly what my family is to me. I can't go home without being reminded of something that I could do to make myself into a better person. I can't spend time with them without realizing that I am among some of the greatest people on earth. To me, my family is the perfect motivation for the "reason for the season" of Thanksgiving - gratitude.
One of the leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has said that "if pride is the root of all evils, than it's opposite - peace, tranquility, and humility - is the root of all good.
I believe that a thankful life is much more fulling than spurts of receiving. So this holiday season, lets all remember to be the best that we can.

Where Are You?

I had a rather cool experience today that made me reflect on a principle that I learned some years ago. I ran into an old friend whom I haven't seen in quite a while, and we immediately started catching up on each other's lives. As he recounted the recent developments in his life, I was surprised by the level of excitement, anticipation, and genuine thankfulness toward God that he displayed. It reminded me all over again why I had chosen to be around him and to have him as friend. His influence helped me to rise higher than I might have on my own.

I once read a book that concerned just those sort of relationships. It was entitled "Surround Yourself With Greatness." The idea is that we rise - or sink - largely to the level of our surroundings. While individual moral strength is taken into account, it is nonetheless a fact that the environment to which we choose to subject ourselves is a major force in the development of our character. It is either a catalyst toward growth or a sinkhole toward disaster. I have personally found this to be true in several instances, for both good and ill.

So my question today to you is thus: Where are you? What are your surroundings? Who have you let into your life, and are you better for it?
We have the power to control the surroundings of our lives. While we cannot dictate everything, it remains in our ability to purposefully select the people we most want to be influenced by - for like it or not, we are influenced by them. As we select good friends that model our desired attributes, we will find our lives to be far more enjoyable and fulling, and we will achieve the greatness that we seek.

Carpe Diem.

Sharpening the Saw

Sometimes life feels like this.

Burned out, I mean. You know the feeling: you've been super productive all day, week, month, etc. You've put task after task on your "to-do" list, and you've crushed it like a boss. Homework? Done. Religious responsibilities? Taken care of. Networking? Crushed it. And so on, and so forth, running yourself as fast as you can - until suddenly you're grinding to a halt. Motivation is gone, purpose is quickly fading, and frustration is taking hold.

I'm currently in the process of reading "7 Habits of Highly Effective People." (I say in the process because I'm taking my sweet time with it.) While it descries seven habits for maximizing potential, the last is a little less intuitive than the others. It's called "sharpening the saw."

It's based around a quick little story about a man found in the forest cutting down a tree with a dull and rusted saw. A passerby stops to ask him why he doesn't stop to care for the blade, to which he replies with contempt: "I cannot do that - I'm too busy sawing."

Isn't that a foolish statement? Any reasonable person knows how much faster the work would progress with a quality blade. Yet how often do we do that in life? How often do I do that in life?

There is something to be said for making time for renewal. We need it - our tools are our bodies, our spirits, our minds. We use them for our good, working out our lives (hopefully) as we dream it to be. Yet in the wear and tear of life, we are not unlike the saw blade - rusted, dull, and inefficient. We would do well to slow down a little, take stock of our condition, and make time for renewal, for things that matter most.

Carpe Diem everyone. 

A World Apart - Long-Distance Interviews.

So, long-distance interviews. You know the ones - over the phone or by Skype/FaceTime.
I've got a bone to pick with them.
I understand the reasons for having them: they're convenient, quick, and cost-effective. They're wonderfully suited for firms with limited spaces to fill and qualified applications coming from long distances away. They allow an interviewer to waste minimal time in between screening applicants, and they allow those applicants to apply even if they reside nowhere near the firm they wish to work for.
Still, there are some things I wish could be better.
I recently had the chance to do a mock interview with a buddy of mine over the phone. While the convenience box had been squarely checked, a number of things surfaced that plagued the conversation. First, the quality of our experience was largely dependent on the strength of our connection. There were a number of times where it was hard to hear one another; casting a negative impression on the whole thing. Second, it felt rather impersonal. I recall thinking that if I were to make a decision at that moment as to whether I should hire him, I would wish I could have talked face-to-face with him. I realize that many firms do just that after phone interviews, but it nonetheless remains a weakness of the long-distance interview.

To sum up: Long distance interviews have several inherent problems; however, I admit their necessity in today's modern world.

Secret to Success

Have you ever thought what makes people successful in life?
It's not natural talent. It's not intelligence. It's not even the right connections.
Now, lest anyone take aim and shoot down that rather bold claim, I don't mean that those things aren't factors. They are, and they make quite a difference. They just aren't the key.

Rather, the number one factor in determining success is a desire to create value - a genuine drive to cause something to be or improve upon an existing foundation, to be a catalyst for change or a beacon for inspiration. It consists of recognizing an unmet need and then going about solving this.

This may sound simple, but I'm afraid that many people never learn that. We grow up being taught to get a good education or experience so we can get a job, to secure employment where we are owed a paycheck. We work six months to a year, and then we expect a raise. We're owed that, right? A higher-up position opens up and we've been there the longest - the spot should be as good as ours. Shouldn't it?
I answer that with a quote from the late Pres. Hinkley of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints: "The world will in large measure pay you what it think you are worth." As said another, "the world owes you nothing. It was here first."
They key difference to be learned can be largely summed up in one word: selflessness. Are we selfishly looking to our own good, feeling entitled to raises and promotions, or do we eschew the titles and the honors and go about doing good, creating value in the lives of others?
That is our choice.

Carpe Diem.